Effective, inspiring, heart-warming communication requires but a certain mindset. Not a mindset of manipulation, but of service. It recognizes and follows a simple rule: people have an endless desire for self-discovery and self-actualization. People want to appear as expressing the identity that they want to become.
Good communication is in the service of realizing that for people. In other words, language is tied up very tightly with a person's identity. People speak from a place that makes sense to them, even if what they say does not seem to make sense. They are always attempting to portray a certain identity or personality through language, one they wish to be affirmed by others whenever speaking.
The simple truth is this: if you create a message that aligns itself with what people perceive as being a part of their identity, you will have significant control over their decisions.
As I said before, the game is not manipulation. Manipulation would be trying to forge an identity for others, trying to convince others to accept as their identity something that does not make sense to them. No -- strategic communication (the art of communication, afterall, is strategic) is about communing, about aligning selectively and thoughtfully your interests and values with others so as to create a better situation for you and others. You will see -- this is a much, much, much better approach than concentrating your efforts on simply getting someone to do what you want.
So again: align your words with another's self-perception, and you will have control over his thoughts and actions. It will allow for the most beautiful of things to occur.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment